In ALL relationships there is some form of conflict. Now the real question is, “how do you handle the conflict or crisis that can occur in the relationship”?
Each person has their own views and values on the way issues should be handled. In any scenario there are many ways to solve it. Two people begin to solve it and that’s when they realized that emotions come out. Whether you are feeling anger, frustration, or sadness they come out! Now how can you handle something when each of you are having your own internal dialogue? Does one of you avoid and distance yourself from the other? Or do you continue to push the other person to talk until the issue is solved? Now this is what is HARD. Both people are having their own feelings and not connecting with each other, making these emotions more visible or less visible. Days, weeks, months continue and guess what that issue comes up again and both of you are left in the same spot from the last time. This is called the negative cycle where many couples get stuck. Furthermore, this is what can make the relationship HARD. This cycle can continue until each person is able to be present in that moment and speak from the heart. If you love to read, pick up a copy of Hold Me Tight by Sue Johnson to get more of an idea how on to improve your relationship. Couples therapy can also help for cycles that are too hard to break.